After

Compelled by nectar

The words come easier

Eager

The first one I can avoid with gritted teeth,

I can’t say no to the rest.

I follow in the footsteps of all the greats

The ones that are remembered with the best stories

It’s always so bitter after the first

But I’m honest.

Rationalize

Excuse

Walked sorry miles

At the time I didn’t know

I didn’t know there’d be so few chances

It feels like tomorrow is infinite,

But really, someday never comes

There is purpose somewhere out there

Telling me of hope that’s somewhere far away

Where rain falls less.

I see you out there

You were always this enigma

Someone I wanted to know

Someone I needed to understand

But now I know.

This is who were are,

We could take pictures together

Perfect smiles,

Mid-laugh

And you’d tell me finally all I ever wondered

All I ever wanted to heal for my father

All the answers he sought at the bottom of the bottle

All the ache he managed in silence

You’d tell me who we all are.

Give me a bed to lie in

So I can stop chasing.

4 thoughts on “After

    1. crystallindsay Post author

      Haha! Yes, I truly appreciate that you read everything and that you care so much but I can’t be defending everything I write ๐Ÿ™‚ Just know that you can enjoy it for what it is.

      Reply

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